It is now time for the first time in our household for Upward Basketball. You know, we are from KY. We went to UK. If there is any sport out there that we know about it is basketball. We have two different basketball goals set up in the boys' room. We have games all the time. So, we would naturally think that Ethan will enjoy basketball. Well, we have had practice three times so far; yesterday we had scrimmage. Please, let the laughter begin.
The past three practices the kids have been introduced to dribbling, passing, shooting, etc. The coach asks the question: "Who dribbles with their right hand?" Ethan raises his hand. " Who dribbles with their left hand?" Ethan raises his hand. Then Ethan starts: "I actually dribble with both hands..." May I mention here-we play on carpet, not much dribbling period. But hey, whatever he thinks.
The kids have been learning defense and offense as well as man-to-man. Ethan's "man" is a tiny sweet little girl who doesn't even go up to his chin. They are supposed to stay with each other and guard each other. During the scrimmage I see Ethan and this little girl talking, standing still with the little girl's hands up in defense mode, actually Ethan telling this girl what he thinks: you need to scoot back, you need to leave me alone. Needless to say, Ethan doesn't appreciate the defense that this little girl is giving him.
Now, we hear the coach tell them, "Get open, get open!!" Ethan does just that, he runs in circles with this little girl chasing him, ending up on the opposite side of the court-completely OBLIVIOUS to the fact that there is a ball that is being thown around them and he is needing to catch it and shoot.
Ethan is a great encourager though. He ends up with the ball, yes miracle in itself, and instead of shooting he throws it to a little girl on his team that is basically the Michael Jordan of the team. He tells her, "Shoot McCall!!! Way to go!!!!" Um, shall we say nonselfish player? I mean, we don't have a ball-hog on our hands, but we have had to talk about being a little bit more aggressive on the court. At one point the ball was almost in between Ethan's legs and he never even looked down to grab it. He told me he never saw it. I don't think we have an Anthony Davis on our hands here, but who knows.
Tomorrow is Linley's first bday party along with the first bball game. Today we had to decorate at the church so we head there for most of the afternoon. It didn't go as planned. I thought, "Hey, I'll let the kids take their scooters, run around, get tired, and we'll be ready to go." Well, that worked, for about 15 minutes. But, Linley Claire had a different plan. She would crawl around crying at the top of her lungs. How can I hang up anything while holding a baby? So, snack time. They are like wolves, they smell it and they all come. So now, everyone is having snack. Then, Caleb thinks Linley needs more goldfish, and then Linley thinks Caleb is so funny that she is going to smash her goldfish and toss them about. Now, everyone has to clean up. So Ethan grabs a broom, Caleb a mop, and Linley stays in her chair laughing being entertained. Ugh. After almost two hours of hanging up and moving stuff around it's finally time to go home. Caleb and Ethan are of course thirsty so they head to the kitchen. Linley is drawn to the church kitchen, I don't know what it is, but if that door is open and she is crawling she is in there. Well, she and Caleb were in there...together...and Caleb found a water bottle. I run in to get Linley and there is Caleb and Linley, Linley mouth open, Caleb squirting water in it. WHAT!!!!!! No telling how long that water bottle had been in that kitchen. So, being the paranoid Mom, I squirted some in my mouth to make sure it was water and it wasn't poisonous. Can we please go home now? Oh, mention here that halfway through the decorating Caleb has an accident and he ends up with no underwear on, surprise surprise I know.
Tonight after supper Ethan and Caleb are playing forts. Ethan makes rules up:1. Caleb, you have to wear a shirt to come in the fort. Caleb goes to put on shirt. 2. Caleb, your underwear must not be on backwards to come in (Caleb likes his underwear on backwards, yes strange). My reply, Ethan, you don't have to worry about backwards underwear, he's not even wearing any.
Tomorrow shall be an entertaining day with the first ball game and first birthday party for Linley.
Friday, January 4, 2013
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
One for the books
Today has been one of those days. You know, one of those days where a Love it size from Coldstone doesn't even hold a candle? Yeah, I need about a gallon.
My friend and I went for a run this morning. We are both running in a race this coming weekend called the Santa Hustle. Therefore, a group of us girls going decided to dress up so we bought red tutus. If you are a runner you know that doing anything out of the ordinary during a run could change everything. So, to prepare I decided to run in my tutu this morning. At 6:15 A.M., down a country road, with it lit up (Did I mention it is a lighted red tutu?), we took our morning run in the dark with our red tutus on. I'm sure the kids on the school bus that passed us at 6:40 got a real kick out of it.
Kind of stressful morning and I didn't get started off with my quiet time...I had to stop mid-morning if we were going to survive the day. I had to shower, with all three kids awake. During that time, I had a basketball goal knocked over, one boy who had to poop (in the same bathroom as me), a baby girl crying and finding her way in between the shower curtain and plastic covering that she had a wet head once it was all said and done. I actually found myself saying, "Hurry!! Shut the toilet lid!!!! Linley, NO!! Do not put your hand in the toilet!" If you know Linley you know that she has stubborn streak about her. She doesn't really like the word No. Meltdown by the baby because I told her no. I made a new rule today, I will NOT hold anyone in the shower. No, I will not do it.
After a couple of arguments my referee hat is on. Not literally, but that is something to think about. Anyway, a compromise is made and one cave- that was built in the boys room using the knocked over basketball goal- is now moved to the living room. Pretty cool idea right? I thought so. Until, Caleb, we shall call him the Starving Artist, decides he wants to color in his new cave. No problem, "Caleb, color only on your paper. DO NOT color on any of the furniture. Do you understand me?" Of course, Mom, who would think of doing that? May, I say that 30 seconds, literally, after those words came out of my mouth what do I find? Caleb, making a very colorful picture on the ottoman...with markers. The kid can color. What can I say? I mean, really, he's a starving artist. Next move, my head did not fly off. Yes,I'm surprised as well. So, in order to appease the starving artist I take away the markers and tape two sheets of paper to the side of the ottoman (which is covered in blankets for the cave effect) and let the boy finish his drawing. John gets to see the drawing when he gets home and if he wants to get it off, go for it.
We did school today. I have to say, of the most memorable things I taught my children today, school will not be it. Why? Argument number gagillion, both boys sent to timeout in same room, til they can get along or I come get them, Linley follows. Then, I hear laughter and crying. I walk in to find something that still amazes me. Linley, sitting in the floor, surrounded by clothes, and Ethan and Caleb pulling ALL of the clothes out of their dresser and throwing them on LC. Are you kidding me? ( I say that alot) At this point I'm pretty sure steam was coming out of my ears. Line em up, spank em out. No one really cried after that. I'm pretty sure it was their guilty consciences. Then, I told them that I was going to walk out to the mail and when I got back every piece of their clothes would be back in their dresser. It sounded good at the time but that doesn't fly, I mean, they couldn't even shut the dresser drawers when I got back. So, the lesson learned today was folding clothes. We layed out several shirts and I taught each of them how to fold shirts. So they were able to practice. A lot, and a lot more. At one point Ethan asked me if he was going to fold forever. No, just today. Now, since they know how to fold shirts, among other things, they will be helping me with the laundry, in just a few minutes.
It's just now 3 in the afternoon, our day isn't over. I love these boys. Yes, I did laugh after all of this.
My friend and I went for a run this morning. We are both running in a race this coming weekend called the Santa Hustle. Therefore, a group of us girls going decided to dress up so we bought red tutus. If you are a runner you know that doing anything out of the ordinary during a run could change everything. So, to prepare I decided to run in my tutu this morning. At 6:15 A.M., down a country road, with it lit up (Did I mention it is a lighted red tutu?), we took our morning run in the dark with our red tutus on. I'm sure the kids on the school bus that passed us at 6:40 got a real kick out of it.
Kind of stressful morning and I didn't get started off with my quiet time...I had to stop mid-morning if we were going to survive the day. I had to shower, with all three kids awake. During that time, I had a basketball goal knocked over, one boy who had to poop (in the same bathroom as me), a baby girl crying and finding her way in between the shower curtain and plastic covering that she had a wet head once it was all said and done. I actually found myself saying, "Hurry!! Shut the toilet lid!!!! Linley, NO!! Do not put your hand in the toilet!" If you know Linley you know that she has stubborn streak about her. She doesn't really like the word No. Meltdown by the baby because I told her no. I made a new rule today, I will NOT hold anyone in the shower. No, I will not do it.
After a couple of arguments my referee hat is on. Not literally, but that is something to think about. Anyway, a compromise is made and one cave- that was built in the boys room using the knocked over basketball goal- is now moved to the living room. Pretty cool idea right? I thought so. Until, Caleb, we shall call him the Starving Artist, decides he wants to color in his new cave. No problem, "Caleb, color only on your paper. DO NOT color on any of the furniture. Do you understand me?" Of course, Mom, who would think of doing that? May, I say that 30 seconds, literally, after those words came out of my mouth what do I find? Caleb, making a very colorful picture on the ottoman...with markers. The kid can color. What can I say? I mean, really, he's a starving artist. Next move, my head did not fly off. Yes,I'm surprised as well. So, in order to appease the starving artist I take away the markers and tape two sheets of paper to the side of the ottoman (which is covered in blankets for the cave effect) and let the boy finish his drawing. John gets to see the drawing when he gets home and if he wants to get it off, go for it.
We did school today. I have to say, of the most memorable things I taught my children today, school will not be it. Why? Argument number gagillion, both boys sent to timeout in same room, til they can get along or I come get them, Linley follows. Then, I hear laughter and crying. I walk in to find something that still amazes me. Linley, sitting in the floor, surrounded by clothes, and Ethan and Caleb pulling ALL of the clothes out of their dresser and throwing them on LC. Are you kidding me? ( I say that alot) At this point I'm pretty sure steam was coming out of my ears. Line em up, spank em out. No one really cried after that. I'm pretty sure it was their guilty consciences. Then, I told them that I was going to walk out to the mail and when I got back every piece of their clothes would be back in their dresser. It sounded good at the time but that doesn't fly, I mean, they couldn't even shut the dresser drawers when I got back. So, the lesson learned today was folding clothes. We layed out several shirts and I taught each of them how to fold shirts. So they were able to practice. A lot, and a lot more. At one point Ethan asked me if he was going to fold forever. No, just today. Now, since they know how to fold shirts, among other things, they will be helping me with the laundry, in just a few minutes.
It's just now 3 in the afternoon, our day isn't over. I love these boys. Yes, I did laugh after all of this.
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Me and Cows-We just don't GeeHaw.
Of course, this has poop. Now we mix in the animals that live outside of the house. For this blog, it needs to be noted that we have a year old jersey bull, a goat, and a new calf.
Me and Cows-we just don't geehaw. Don't get me wrong, cows are great animals. They provide milk, they provide meat, they are great lawnmowers. However, to choose one of God's favorite creatures for me would NOT be the cow. We slaughter a cow once a year. That provides us meat (and a way cheaper grocery bill) for an entire year. We are picking up dear old Spot on Friday from the slaughter house. We just got a new calf in-has to be fed a bottle twice a day. Oh, so cute, you may think. Yes, that's what I thought to. Until...
Yesterday morning, 6:45 A.M.-fill up the bottle with scalding water and head outside. 27.1 degrees F. Yes, it is cold. Just got done with a blessed run (and that it really was). I make the bottle and head down to the barn. I go into the barn and see that lovely calf anxiously awaiting my arrival. Breakfast. I open the door and am almost plowed down by a 100lb St. Bernard sized calf. Apparently, I'm not fast enough to get the bottle in the holder. He gets behind me and litterally headbutts my rear end with his slobery cold nose. Are you kidding me? Now cow, let me tell you a few things-1. Don't bite (or head butt) the hand(rear end) that feeds you.
2. Do you know what time it is or the temperature? You should be thankful I'm out here in this freezing weather with a hot bottle to feed you.
For some reason I don't think the calf would appreciate my lecture.
This morning, 7:30 A.M. I head outside to feed the calf again. I go into the field and who meets me but the bull and the goat. Okay, so this bull does has horns. And apparently he wants more than just grass for his breakfast. I, quite hurriedly, get into the barn to feed the baby calf. I'm holding the bottle feeding the terrible mannered calf when behind me comes the bull INTO the barn stall with me. This is not my idea of good. Got the calf fed and much to his dismay there in none left. So I head out of his stall and he is trying to headbutt me some more because apparently he wanted more. And then I face the bull. But wait, I can't get out of the barn. The bull is on the other side, horns on the door. He really wants something besides grass. I finally get out of that side of the barn by bribing him with an empty calf bottle. Not a good move on my part, now he wants this bottle. So I run into the other side of the barn where the straw is. I can't even shut the door because the bull is behind me trying to eat the bottle!! So, I finally get in the other side of the barn with bulls head stuck in the door and I can't get it shut. Ugh. He pulls out and there I am stranded, in the barn, a bull on the outside, me and straw on the inside.
What in the world am I going to do? I'm stuck IN A BARN. And who is here to get me out? Ethan and Caleb who are still in the house watching Cat in the Hat. They will get hungry so they would come out to get me. Distraction. -Yes, this is how a woman's brain works.
So, I grab some straw, toss it as far away from the entrance as possible and make a break for it. That sufficed.
Now, this afternoon I get to do this again. Me vs the cows. So, I have to say, my kids have taught me many things. For one, I must laugh or I will scream. Two, prayer is vital. Three, if you want to scare a cow run up to it and scream at the top of your lungs. So, I tried that on the way to the barn. I'm walking briskly to the barn hoping the bull will fail to notice me. No such luck. I turn around, he stops, and I scream at the top of my lungs walking towards the bull. He must have thought I was crazy. I get the baby calf fed and run in a few circles with him as I grab my so-called "weapon" to make it back to the yard. Yeah, I bet I looked tough, in my fleece heart pajama pants, pink ear warmers, calf bottle, and 7 foot tall stick that has calf poop on it. I head outside. Yep, I'm definitely intimidating. Just call me Tori the Intimidator. That bull looked at me and ate his scrap of straw left over from this morning. Ha, I won this one.
Did I mention tonight is AWANA pajama night? The boys and I are all dressed up in our pj's heading to church. I had to change my pj's from the cow trip because that calf made me stink, or so I thought. I get in the house and man, all I smell is poop. Cow poop. Then, I hear Caleb, Mom I pooped. Cow poop. Kid poop. I'm surrounded by poop.
Pj's changed, kids loaded, and doggone it if I don't smell that cow poop again in the van. What in the world? That's when I scream aloud in the van, MY SHOES!!! Yes, my kids probably think I should be in a looney bin somewhere. Then, an explanation to them why I screamed my shoes. Must have made a real impression on Ethan, he told all kinds of people at AWANA tonight why I wasn't wearing my shoes, they smell like cow poop.
So, tonight, off to bed. In the morning: run, and meet my nemesis again.
Me and Cows-we just don't geehaw. Don't get me wrong, cows are great animals. They provide milk, they provide meat, they are great lawnmowers. However, to choose one of God's favorite creatures for me would NOT be the cow. We slaughter a cow once a year. That provides us meat (and a way cheaper grocery bill) for an entire year. We are picking up dear old Spot on Friday from the slaughter house. We just got a new calf in-has to be fed a bottle twice a day. Oh, so cute, you may think. Yes, that's what I thought to. Until...
Yesterday morning, 6:45 A.M.-fill up the bottle with scalding water and head outside. 27.1 degrees F. Yes, it is cold. Just got done with a blessed run (and that it really was). I make the bottle and head down to the barn. I go into the barn and see that lovely calf anxiously awaiting my arrival. Breakfast. I open the door and am almost plowed down by a 100lb St. Bernard sized calf. Apparently, I'm not fast enough to get the bottle in the holder. He gets behind me and litterally headbutts my rear end with his slobery cold nose. Are you kidding me? Now cow, let me tell you a few things-1. Don't bite (or head butt) the hand(rear end) that feeds you.
2. Do you know what time it is or the temperature? You should be thankful I'm out here in this freezing weather with a hot bottle to feed you.
For some reason I don't think the calf would appreciate my lecture.
This morning, 7:30 A.M. I head outside to feed the calf again. I go into the field and who meets me but the bull and the goat. Okay, so this bull does has horns. And apparently he wants more than just grass for his breakfast. I, quite hurriedly, get into the barn to feed the baby calf. I'm holding the bottle feeding the terrible mannered calf when behind me comes the bull INTO the barn stall with me. This is not my idea of good. Got the calf fed and much to his dismay there in none left. So I head out of his stall and he is trying to headbutt me some more because apparently he wanted more. And then I face the bull. But wait, I can't get out of the barn. The bull is on the other side, horns on the door. He really wants something besides grass. I finally get out of that side of the barn by bribing him with an empty calf bottle. Not a good move on my part, now he wants this bottle. So I run into the other side of the barn where the straw is. I can't even shut the door because the bull is behind me trying to eat the bottle!! So, I finally get in the other side of the barn with bulls head stuck in the door and I can't get it shut. Ugh. He pulls out and there I am stranded, in the barn, a bull on the outside, me and straw on the inside.
What in the world am I going to do? I'm stuck IN A BARN. And who is here to get me out? Ethan and Caleb who are still in the house watching Cat in the Hat. They will get hungry so they would come out to get me. Distraction. -Yes, this is how a woman's brain works.
So, I grab some straw, toss it as far away from the entrance as possible and make a break for it. That sufficed.
Now, this afternoon I get to do this again. Me vs the cows. So, I have to say, my kids have taught me many things. For one, I must laugh or I will scream. Two, prayer is vital. Three, if you want to scare a cow run up to it and scream at the top of your lungs. So, I tried that on the way to the barn. I'm walking briskly to the barn hoping the bull will fail to notice me. No such luck. I turn around, he stops, and I scream at the top of my lungs walking towards the bull. He must have thought I was crazy. I get the baby calf fed and run in a few circles with him as I grab my so-called "weapon" to make it back to the yard. Yeah, I bet I looked tough, in my fleece heart pajama pants, pink ear warmers, calf bottle, and 7 foot tall stick that has calf poop on it. I head outside. Yep, I'm definitely intimidating. Just call me Tori the Intimidator. That bull looked at me and ate his scrap of straw left over from this morning. Ha, I won this one.
Did I mention tonight is AWANA pajama night? The boys and I are all dressed up in our pj's heading to church. I had to change my pj's from the cow trip because that calf made me stink, or so I thought. I get in the house and man, all I smell is poop. Cow poop. Then, I hear Caleb, Mom I pooped. Cow poop. Kid poop. I'm surrounded by poop.
Pj's changed, kids loaded, and doggone it if I don't smell that cow poop again in the van. What in the world? That's when I scream aloud in the van, MY SHOES!!! Yes, my kids probably think I should be in a looney bin somewhere. Then, an explanation to them why I screamed my shoes. Must have made a real impression on Ethan, he told all kinds of people at AWANA tonight why I wasn't wearing my shoes, they smell like cow poop.
So, tonight, off to bed. In the morning: run, and meet my nemesis again.
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Crack me up
Days like today, and the past couple days, I just crack up. In a good way :)
My boys now have a new obsession with Star Wars. You know, the 80's versions. Caleb even sings the Darth Vader song. When he sees the ship he even says, "There my ship." in the deepest voice possible. For Halloween the boys are going to be Star Wars themed. Caleb: Darth Vader; Ethan: Luke (the starship kind where he gets to wear the airplane suit and helmet); and Linley Claire: Yoda. Caleb already has his costume on around the house. I was putting up clothes when something hits me right behind my knees. What in the world? I turn around and what do I see? Caleb, in his Darth Vader costume-" I chop off your legs." in his Darth Vader voice as he is holding his light saber. Then, deep discussion on how we really can't hit people with our light sabers like Darth Vader did in the movie.
Yesterday, Caleb runs to his room. My first instinct: poop. So of course I tell him to go sit on the potty. But, before I know it here comes Caleb sans underwear and pants sporting only his pajama shirt. Here's the dialogue:
Me: Caleb, did you poop?
Caleb: uh-huh.
Me: Go to the bathroom to get cleaned up.
Caleb: NOOOOOO!!!!!!
break here for drama in the bathroom.
Me: Caleb, where is your poop?
Caleb: in my room.
Note-we have a dog who poops outside, maybe Caleb should go outside with him. Just a thought.
Me: Here's the toilet paper, go pick up your poop and put it in here.
Caleb: NOOOOOOO!!! (Seeing a pattern here? That's three for you).
Enter bedroom where there is poop on the floor. Seriously?
Me: you are not leaving this room til you are done picking up your poop and have self-control.
Caleb: NOOOOOOO!!!!!
5 minutes later, poop gone and Caleb now has "Self-control" and doesn't whine for about 30 seconds. We're still working on that character trait.
Today, and yesterday, and the past few weeks, I've been balancing the checkbook, you know, your favorite thing to do in the whole world. John and I have a plac ewhere we keep all the receipts and then I write them all down at one time. So, I am working on that and left them on the love seat last night. And this is what I saw this morning:
My boys now have a new obsession with Star Wars. You know, the 80's versions. Caleb even sings the Darth Vader song. When he sees the ship he even says, "There my ship." in the deepest voice possible. For Halloween the boys are going to be Star Wars themed. Caleb: Darth Vader; Ethan: Luke (the starship kind where he gets to wear the airplane suit and helmet); and Linley Claire: Yoda. Caleb already has his costume on around the house. I was putting up clothes when something hits me right behind my knees. What in the world? I turn around and what do I see? Caleb, in his Darth Vader costume-" I chop off your legs." in his Darth Vader voice as he is holding his light saber. Then, deep discussion on how we really can't hit people with our light sabers like Darth Vader did in the movie.
Yesterday, Caleb runs to his room. My first instinct: poop. So of course I tell him to go sit on the potty. But, before I know it here comes Caleb sans underwear and pants sporting only his pajama shirt. Here's the dialogue:
Me: Caleb, did you poop?
Caleb: uh-huh.
Me: Go to the bathroom to get cleaned up.
Caleb: NOOOOOO!!!!!!
break here for drama in the bathroom.
Me: Caleb, where is your poop?
Caleb: in my room.
Note-we have a dog who poops outside, maybe Caleb should go outside with him. Just a thought.
Me: Here's the toilet paper, go pick up your poop and put it in here.
Caleb: NOOOOOOO!!! (Seeing a pattern here? That's three for you).
Enter bedroom where there is poop on the floor. Seriously?
Me: you are not leaving this room til you are done picking up your poop and have self-control.
Caleb: NOOOOOOO!!!!!
5 minutes later, poop gone and Caleb now has "Self-control" and doesn't whine for about 30 seconds. We're still working on that character trait.
Today, and yesterday, and the past few weeks, I've been balancing the checkbook, you know, your favorite thing to do in the whole world. John and I have a plac ewhere we keep all the receipts and then I write them all down at one time. So, I am working on that and left them on the love seat last night. And this is what I saw this morning:
andthis:
Yes, this is my new messer.
Oh well, so much for organization, Then, five minutes later this is what happens:
Those are clean dishes. Linley is a climber. And now wet.
We get school started and we are doing our devotional. We're talking about the importance of having good friends. We discuss the verse, "As iron sharpens iron so one man sharpens another." Of course, I go deep with it and try to illustrate it for them:
Me: Boys, it's kind of like swords or your light sabers. To make something sharper you have to rub it against something else. Like a knife. You rub it back and forth and it gets sharper and sharper. That's the way it is with friends. We need to choose friends who help us to do good to others, love the Lord more. That way we become better at serving others, and loving the Lord.
In my head: good analogy. Are they getting this? Did they understand the illustrations?
Ethan: Mom, you don't sharpen light sabers.
Oh well. They really do crack me up :)
Monday, October 15, 2012
Life on the farm
To begin today's blog I have some thoughts, about the boxes we put people in. I still kind of see myself as a normal city girl. Grew up in town (albeit rural town), went to public school, went to UK, lived and road raged with several hundred thousand people, went to a great church, went to some great bball games -GO CATS; but now I'm on the farm...with three children...and I homeschool. If I were to see someone like me I would think, yeah, they're a farmer and kind of weird to homeschool, and a lot of kids, with a lot of mess and craziness. When people refer to me as living on a farm and being a farmer I really just laugh to myself. You're talking about the woman who just had a pedicure last week and now my toes are messed up because I wore my steel-toed boots outside with no socks on to tend to the animals. Oh well, I like my steel-toed boots. You're talking about the girl who still won't touch a chicken unless I'm wearing garden gloves. Now, I don't dress up as much, I have coveralls that I wear in the winter that make me look like a really short man, I throw apples at goats, I clean up poop frequently. Oh well. I like that I homeschool. I like that I live on a farm. I like my boots. So, keep that in mind as you read this.
Linley, 5:30 A.M. 101.7 fever. Not best way to start out the morning. Morning run was actually quite pleasant. I didn't feel like my lungs were going to explode and my legs were happy with me. At 6:35 when I get back in, guess who meets me? Ethan. Really, it's 6:35 IN THE MORNING and you don't go to school. Please, sleep in. Get my stairclimbing and halfway through in comes John carrying Caleb who is not very happy that he is up at this hour. So, John is off to work and we start our day officially. Now it's time to tend to the animals...and both boys want to go...which is a huge chore just to get the correct shoes on them (there is a dew and they have to wear boots.) Caleb is throwing a hissy fit because something is in his. So, I stick my hand in his boot and pull something out. Ok, as I'm writing this my bp is rising because I am a sissy. So, I jerk it out and throw it onto the concrete pretending to my children that this is no big deal but inwardly I'm screaming: WHAT IS THIS I'M TOUCHING??? HURRY!! GET IT OUT!! Yeah, it's some type of nest for probably some wasp or dirt dobber. I squished til the guts came out. Caleb thought that was real cool that it was yellow on the inside. We tend to the turkeys, cats, chickens, and then Ollie who is so happy to see everyone at 7:15 this morning. Wet jumping dog-EWW.
Linley Claire is still asleep so time for a shower, my devotional, and get myself done as much as possible. Now, let me note that my quiet time I like to have QUIET. Not necessarily by myself, but quiet. However, Ethan chooses this time to debate when we are going to start school, can we wait til after Linley gets back from the doctor to start? Caleb is flipping out due to the fact that he thought Spot (our cow) is going to get out of the fence to get slaughtered. Bless him, he doesn't understand that the cow is going to his death but he's more worried that the cow is going to get him. Finally, I say, I am having my prayer time. I need to talk to God. I need quiet. Now. Surprisingly that worked. Now time for LC to get up, yay no fever at this moment!, get some food in her , litterally only some since she has this cold virus, and then the child poops...twice. Man, that was rough. What time is it? The doctor is at 10:40. Uhoh. Time to start school so off we go downstairs. We start and Linley is screaming while we're doing math. I finally pick her up and all are happy.
Side note: boys. Like to talk about poop. Compare poop. Observe poop. Think it's so cool that they ask others to come look at their poop. Yes, this discussion really happened today with Ethan.
Time for the doctor, only a virus so no meds and off we dash back home. I walk in the door and it's time to fix all lunches. Linley is still in her seat while the boys are running as fast as they can through the house talking about lunch. Finally, they eat, I get her some food, she throws a fit-still doesn't feel good, and now I can eat. Did I mention we were on vacation the last 7 days? Therefore, my house runneth over with clothes...everywhere. So, working on the various piles and Linley has had it and it's time for her to go down and the rest of school. Reading actually goes off without a hitch, and Caleb is begging for his darth vader costume. Darth Vader clothed, we finish school. We run back upstairs and I'm working on clothes, again, when something hits me on the back of my legs. I turn, and what do I see but a miniature Darth Vader with his light-saber saying, "I cut your legs off." Then, deep discussion on how we really aren't supposed to hit people with our light-sabers.
Now, to take the clothes off the line and tend to the animals. May I note here that this is when my bff, Heather is listening to all that is going on. So, picture this, me, a vbs t-shirt, workout shorts, and steel-toe boots walking through the yard when I see nothing but that daggone goat out of the electric fence. Debate, to leave the goat or chase? I left it for the moment. Not in these boots. Uh oh, forgot to open the chicken hatch so now the eggs are underneath their laying boxes. So, top propped open and I'm leaning over the chicken coop praying that I don't fall in or the top close on me unexpectedly and knock me in there. I'm sure the goat got a kick out of this. Lay the eggs down to feed the dog and what does he do? Chases down an egg and eats it!! Are you kidding me? The dog won't fetch with a ball but will run after an egg!! I run back inside, working on dinner, getting ready for church pictures and what happens? Caleb poops in his underwear. Waddling like a duck with poop in his britches. Really? Cleaned up, now to finish dinner. I'm looking out the window and what do I see? That stinking goat nibbling on our apple tree. So, as any person in their right mind would do. I open the fridge, grab two old apples, run out the back door, and chunk the apple a tthe goat trying to tempt it away from the tree. It worked. Now, to try and temp it into the fence. No luck, the grass is literally greener on this side of the fence.
John gets home and I look out the window of the kitchen and I see Ethan running across the back yard literally chasing the goat. That was the funniest thing I have seen all day. So I naturally grab the camera and run outside and make him do it again. Time to eat, get ready for pictures, and then head to Wal-Mart and then get everyone ready for bed. I'm tired.
So, after reading this I'm still not convinced I'm a farmer, or too weird that I'm homeschool, or nuts because I have so much poop around me. I'm just a woman saved by God's grace doing what He's called me to do. Thank Him for where I'm at and trust Him with everything. That's all I can do.
Linley, 5:30 A.M. 101.7 fever. Not best way to start out the morning. Morning run was actually quite pleasant. I didn't feel like my lungs were going to explode and my legs were happy with me. At 6:35 when I get back in, guess who meets me? Ethan. Really, it's 6:35 IN THE MORNING and you don't go to school. Please, sleep in. Get my stairclimbing and halfway through in comes John carrying Caleb who is not very happy that he is up at this hour. So, John is off to work and we start our day officially. Now it's time to tend to the animals...and both boys want to go...which is a huge chore just to get the correct shoes on them (there is a dew and they have to wear boots.) Caleb is throwing a hissy fit because something is in his. So, I stick my hand in his boot and pull something out. Ok, as I'm writing this my bp is rising because I am a sissy. So, I jerk it out and throw it onto the concrete pretending to my children that this is no big deal but inwardly I'm screaming: WHAT IS THIS I'M TOUCHING??? HURRY!! GET IT OUT!! Yeah, it's some type of nest for probably some wasp or dirt dobber. I squished til the guts came out. Caleb thought that was real cool that it was yellow on the inside. We tend to the turkeys, cats, chickens, and then Ollie who is so happy to see everyone at 7:15 this morning. Wet jumping dog-EWW.
Linley Claire is still asleep so time for a shower, my devotional, and get myself done as much as possible. Now, let me note that my quiet time I like to have QUIET. Not necessarily by myself, but quiet. However, Ethan chooses this time to debate when we are going to start school, can we wait til after Linley gets back from the doctor to start? Caleb is flipping out due to the fact that he thought Spot (our cow) is going to get out of the fence to get slaughtered. Bless him, he doesn't understand that the cow is going to his death but he's more worried that the cow is going to get him. Finally, I say, I am having my prayer time. I need to talk to God. I need quiet. Now. Surprisingly that worked. Now time for LC to get up, yay no fever at this moment!, get some food in her , litterally only some since she has this cold virus, and then the child poops...twice. Man, that was rough. What time is it? The doctor is at 10:40. Uhoh. Time to start school so off we go downstairs. We start and Linley is screaming while we're doing math. I finally pick her up and all are happy.
Side note: boys. Like to talk about poop. Compare poop. Observe poop. Think it's so cool that they ask others to come look at their poop. Yes, this discussion really happened today with Ethan.
Time for the doctor, only a virus so no meds and off we dash back home. I walk in the door and it's time to fix all lunches. Linley is still in her seat while the boys are running as fast as they can through the house talking about lunch. Finally, they eat, I get her some food, she throws a fit-still doesn't feel good, and now I can eat. Did I mention we were on vacation the last 7 days? Therefore, my house runneth over with clothes...everywhere. So, working on the various piles and Linley has had it and it's time for her to go down and the rest of school. Reading actually goes off without a hitch, and Caleb is begging for his darth vader costume. Darth Vader clothed, we finish school. We run back upstairs and I'm working on clothes, again, when something hits me on the back of my legs. I turn, and what do I see but a miniature Darth Vader with his light-saber saying, "I cut your legs off." Then, deep discussion on how we really aren't supposed to hit people with our light-sabers.
Now, to take the clothes off the line and tend to the animals. May I note here that this is when my bff, Heather is listening to all that is going on. So, picture this, me, a vbs t-shirt, workout shorts, and steel-toe boots walking through the yard when I see nothing but that daggone goat out of the electric fence. Debate, to leave the goat or chase? I left it for the moment. Not in these boots. Uh oh, forgot to open the chicken hatch so now the eggs are underneath their laying boxes. So, top propped open and I'm leaning over the chicken coop praying that I don't fall in or the top close on me unexpectedly and knock me in there. I'm sure the goat got a kick out of this. Lay the eggs down to feed the dog and what does he do? Chases down an egg and eats it!! Are you kidding me? The dog won't fetch with a ball but will run after an egg!! I run back inside, working on dinner, getting ready for church pictures and what happens? Caleb poops in his underwear. Waddling like a duck with poop in his britches. Really? Cleaned up, now to finish dinner. I'm looking out the window and what do I see? That stinking goat nibbling on our apple tree. So, as any person in their right mind would do. I open the fridge, grab two old apples, run out the back door, and chunk the apple a tthe goat trying to tempt it away from the tree. It worked. Now, to try and temp it into the fence. No luck, the grass is literally greener on this side of the fence.
John gets home and I look out the window of the kitchen and I see Ethan running across the back yard literally chasing the goat. That was the funniest thing I have seen all day. So I naturally grab the camera and run outside and make him do it again. Time to eat, get ready for pictures, and then head to Wal-Mart and then get everyone ready for bed. I'm tired.
So, after reading this I'm still not convinced I'm a farmer, or too weird that I'm homeschool, or nuts because I have so much poop around me. I'm just a woman saved by God's grace doing what He's called me to do. Thank Him for where I'm at and trust Him with everything. That's all I can do.
Saturday, September 29, 2012
It never goes away
Warning: if you cannot handle poop or the discussion thereof, do not read this post. There's your warning. Really, warning.
I'm reading a new book, Unglued. It's really good. I went to the dotMOM conference a week ago and it literally was one of the best conferences I've been to in my entire life. I picked up this book there and today I am in chapter three. The gist: God using situations to chip away at our character to make something beautiful. Chip, chip, chip. Poop situations are alot of my chipping right now.
This morning started early as normal...Caleb needed milk at 6:15 and then at 6:30 he decided it's time for us to get up. Hello, does this kid not get the Saturday morning memo??? Sleep late, let Mom and Dad along with your brother sleep late!! Linley is up not long after. Trying to let John sleep in on a Saturday after a long work week is not the easiest thing to do with a baby crying through the monitor, two boys running through the house screaming, and then boys climbing into the crib playing with their sister all through the monitor. Needless to say, the whole house was up by 7:30. Luckily. I get to go for a run before John has to run errands so out the door I go, not telling anyone goodbye. At the bottom of the steps, there is a brown rock, but wait,it's not a rock. Hold on, Caleb has not been outside yet. Hmmm. The wheels start turning. Ollie has brought up Caleb's poop that he disposed of himself YESTERDAY. Note to self: do not let the dog lick me. What do I do? Fane ignorance and hit the road. That poop will be dealt with later.
Later on in the morning, John has taken the boys to run "Man errands" aka Lowe's, Tractor Supply, and a quick trip for me to Fred's. So, I get to make a mad dash to clean up the house and sweep. Yes, Linley is all over the place and is like our little vaccuum cleaner so I'm having to sweep costantly. I need to mop but wait til the boys get home with our new floor cleaner. Isn't it sad how happy a new cleaner with a new smell can make your day brighter? So, now I get the floor mopped while Linley is napping. (I'm leaving out all the details I have today with our new embroidery machine. Really, if there is anything that could go wrong with a sewing project, this has been it. That's why it's 10 P.M. and I'm just now blogging.) She gets up and I'm at the table working on that daggum sewing project and Linley is crawling around watching the boys play with batman. She, being at this oral-fixation stage (Yeah, you like my ten-cent word?) is chewing on something. It really can't be anything much, I mean, I have swept AND mopped underneath this table just moments before. Well, she spits it out and it looks like mud so I pick it up to throw it away. Hold on, WHAT IS THAT SMELL? It smells like....dog poop!!! Then, I smell the mud, no wait, it's not mud, it's Ollie's poop!!! Okay, this is mind boggling to me due to the fact that I JUST GOT DONE CLEANING!!!! I guess I shouldn't sweep or mop, she hasn't done this before but now that I'm in cleaning mode she gets poop in her mouth. So, a mini-flip out and I rush Linley to the bathroom and clean her mouth out with her toothbrush. IT's time to go to the Banana Festival so I tell Ethan to run out and get John to come in and change. I hear him yelling out the back, "Dad! It's time to go to the parade and get CANDY!!! Guess what LInley just ate? DOG POOP?" Yes, I'm sure John is wonderin gwhat in the world I do with these children and the house all day.
We make it to the Banana Festival where Ethan yells at the people to throw him candy. One man tells the other onlookers, "Sorry, I'm out." Ethan, looks at him and yells, "THAT'S OKAY!!!" Yes, this 40 year old told Ethan thanks for understanding. We ten saw these lightsabers everywhere. Caleb sees one and, being in the Stars Wars mode right now, he says, "I need my lightsaver." So, after the free banana pudding John grabs two lightsabers and we're on our way to Wal-Mart and home. As you can imagine, giving two lightsabers to a 5 and 3 year old boys was pretty entertaining. Finally, we made a rule that you had to turn it off in the van while driving. Yes, in the dark I'm sure our van looked pretty interesting with two lightsabers being swung all over the back. At one point, Linley is crying and Ethan is needed to give her her pacifier. Ethan, being 5, says he can't see it. He can ONLY see it and get it if he uses his lightsaber. Of course you'll do anything to get the crying baby to quit so I cave and say yes. Lightsaber saved the day and pacifier plugged in the mouth.
Bathtime and fighting match time so the boys are playing while we throw Linley in the tub first. I'm fixing her bottle while John is bathing Linley and I look out the window and I see Caleb (this is at 8:30 P.M.) running in the back shed chasing the cats with his lightsaber. Really? The poor cats. Now, Ethan comes running in the kitchen saying, Mom we can't take a bath yet. Me, of course thinking what in the world has happened now. He then informs me that Linley has pooped in the tub. I walk in to assess the situation and John, being the dad, thinks it's quite funny that while bathing Linley she was comfortable enough to poop in the tub. Me, I don't handle poop in water very well so John saved the day and cleaned it up. Ugh.
Now, all are bathed, I'm literally so pooped that I'm laying in the floor of the hallway waiting for John so we can put everyone to bed when I see Ethan run from the kitchen to the living room with his lightsaber screaming, behind him comes Caleb running with his lightsaber, and then behind him crawling on the floor comes Linley after them. This is mayhem. I just laugh my head off. Praise the Lord it's time for bed.
I'm reading a new book, Unglued. It's really good. I went to the dotMOM conference a week ago and it literally was one of the best conferences I've been to in my entire life. I picked up this book there and today I am in chapter three. The gist: God using situations to chip away at our character to make something beautiful. Chip, chip, chip. Poop situations are alot of my chipping right now.
This morning started early as normal...Caleb needed milk at 6:15 and then at 6:30 he decided it's time for us to get up. Hello, does this kid not get the Saturday morning memo??? Sleep late, let Mom and Dad along with your brother sleep late!! Linley is up not long after. Trying to let John sleep in on a Saturday after a long work week is not the easiest thing to do with a baby crying through the monitor, two boys running through the house screaming, and then boys climbing into the crib playing with their sister all through the monitor. Needless to say, the whole house was up by 7:30. Luckily. I get to go for a run before John has to run errands so out the door I go, not telling anyone goodbye. At the bottom of the steps, there is a brown rock, but wait,it's not a rock. Hold on, Caleb has not been outside yet. Hmmm. The wheels start turning. Ollie has brought up Caleb's poop that he disposed of himself YESTERDAY. Note to self: do not let the dog lick me. What do I do? Fane ignorance and hit the road. That poop will be dealt with later.
Later on in the morning, John has taken the boys to run "Man errands" aka Lowe's, Tractor Supply, and a quick trip for me to Fred's. So, I get to make a mad dash to clean up the house and sweep. Yes, Linley is all over the place and is like our little vaccuum cleaner so I'm having to sweep costantly. I need to mop but wait til the boys get home with our new floor cleaner. Isn't it sad how happy a new cleaner with a new smell can make your day brighter? So, now I get the floor mopped while Linley is napping. (I'm leaving out all the details I have today with our new embroidery machine. Really, if there is anything that could go wrong with a sewing project, this has been it. That's why it's 10 P.M. and I'm just now blogging.) She gets up and I'm at the table working on that daggum sewing project and Linley is crawling around watching the boys play with batman. She, being at this oral-fixation stage (Yeah, you like my ten-cent word?) is chewing on something. It really can't be anything much, I mean, I have swept AND mopped underneath this table just moments before. Well, she spits it out and it looks like mud so I pick it up to throw it away. Hold on, WHAT IS THAT SMELL? It smells like....dog poop!!! Then, I smell the mud, no wait, it's not mud, it's Ollie's poop!!! Okay, this is mind boggling to me due to the fact that I JUST GOT DONE CLEANING!!!! I guess I shouldn't sweep or mop, she hasn't done this before but now that I'm in cleaning mode she gets poop in her mouth. So, a mini-flip out and I rush Linley to the bathroom and clean her mouth out with her toothbrush. IT's time to go to the Banana Festival so I tell Ethan to run out and get John to come in and change. I hear him yelling out the back, "Dad! It's time to go to the parade and get CANDY!!! Guess what LInley just ate? DOG POOP?" Yes, I'm sure John is wonderin gwhat in the world I do with these children and the house all day.
We make it to the Banana Festival where Ethan yells at the people to throw him candy. One man tells the other onlookers, "Sorry, I'm out." Ethan, looks at him and yells, "THAT'S OKAY!!!" Yes, this 40 year old told Ethan thanks for understanding. We ten saw these lightsabers everywhere. Caleb sees one and, being in the Stars Wars mode right now, he says, "I need my lightsaver." So, after the free banana pudding John grabs two lightsabers and we're on our way to Wal-Mart and home. As you can imagine, giving two lightsabers to a 5 and 3 year old boys was pretty entertaining. Finally, we made a rule that you had to turn it off in the van while driving. Yes, in the dark I'm sure our van looked pretty interesting with two lightsabers being swung all over the back. At one point, Linley is crying and Ethan is needed to give her her pacifier. Ethan, being 5, says he can't see it. He can ONLY see it and get it if he uses his lightsaber. Of course you'll do anything to get the crying baby to quit so I cave and say yes. Lightsaber saved the day and pacifier plugged in the mouth.
Bathtime and fighting match time so the boys are playing while we throw Linley in the tub first. I'm fixing her bottle while John is bathing Linley and I look out the window and I see Caleb (this is at 8:30 P.M.) running in the back shed chasing the cats with his lightsaber. Really? The poor cats. Now, Ethan comes running in the kitchen saying, Mom we can't take a bath yet. Me, of course thinking what in the world has happened now. He then informs me that Linley has pooped in the tub. I walk in to assess the situation and John, being the dad, thinks it's quite funny that while bathing Linley she was comfortable enough to poop in the tub. Me, I don't handle poop in water very well so John saved the day and cleaned it up. Ugh.
Now, all are bathed, I'm literally so pooped that I'm laying in the floor of the hallway waiting for John so we can put everyone to bed when I see Ethan run from the kitchen to the living room with his lightsaber screaming, behind him comes Caleb running with his lightsaber, and then behind him crawling on the floor comes Linley after them. This is mayhem. I just laugh my head off. Praise the Lord it's time for bed.
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Similarities to cats
We have cats. Several of them. All outside. They serve a purpose: eat mice and moles. My children have an odd relationship with our cats.
You may ask why? Several reasons:
Our cats are somewhat brave/ somewhat stupid. We have Ollie now, and they just hang around letting the dog harrass them and they just swat at him and go on. My children play with the cats. Sometimes, the cats aren't smart enough to run away and hide. For instance, a couple of days ago the boys are outside playing in the yard while I'm watching them from the dining room doing some sewing. All of a sudden, something hits the window. It wasn't a rock. I run outside in a rage and then I see something else flying. It's not our turkeys. Next, comes discipline and a lesson on respecting all of God's creatures. Reasoning, the cat scratched me. My response: I would have scratched you too.
Cats poop outside on the ground, covered up. Today, I walk to the garage after seeing Caleb streak through. What do I find? No, it's not cat poop but kid poop. Are you serious? (I say that alot lately). After cleaning out the "Litter box" of Caleb I see him getting a spoonful of dirt and acting like he is covering up his poop. No, Caleb, you are not a cat, but a boy.
Sidenote: I come inside, I'm working on a project we have going on and the boys, being boys, are banished outside for a time due to their similarity to wild indians while Linley is asleep. So, all of a sudden both boys come marching in the house telling me I had to see something. Uh oh. I walk outside and there, on the roof of the garage, is Ethan's pillow pet "Wild Ears" on the roof. A pillow pet, outside, on the roof. I wouldn't have thought to put him there. Ethan's response: "Can you let me climb up there and get it?" Uh, no, but at least he asked.
An hour or so later we are inside. The boys are playing at the train table and I smell something. Linley is asleep so it can't be her dirty diaper. Next, who's to blame but Caleb.
Me: Caleb, did you poop?
Caleb: very quietly, Uh huh.
Me: You pooped AGAIN? Where?
Caleb: In the kitchen.
Me to myself: 1. Disgusting.
2. How much poop can 1 child have?
3. Disgusting.
4. I've got to clean that up. Or should he have to clean that up? No, I'm too much of a germ-a-phobe to have him clean it up.
5. I think I might cry.
Poop cleaned up, Praise the Lord Mammy has come over so I can go to a yard sale and meet John for a movie, where I don't have to clean up any one or anything's poop, or think about cats.
You may ask why? Several reasons:
Our cats are somewhat brave/ somewhat stupid. We have Ollie now, and they just hang around letting the dog harrass them and they just swat at him and go on. My children play with the cats. Sometimes, the cats aren't smart enough to run away and hide. For instance, a couple of days ago the boys are outside playing in the yard while I'm watching them from the dining room doing some sewing. All of a sudden, something hits the window. It wasn't a rock. I run outside in a rage and then I see something else flying. It's not our turkeys. Next, comes discipline and a lesson on respecting all of God's creatures. Reasoning, the cat scratched me. My response: I would have scratched you too.
Cats poop outside on the ground, covered up. Today, I walk to the garage after seeing Caleb streak through. What do I find? No, it's not cat poop but kid poop. Are you serious? (I say that alot lately). After cleaning out the "Litter box" of Caleb I see him getting a spoonful of dirt and acting like he is covering up his poop. No, Caleb, you are not a cat, but a boy.
Sidenote: I come inside, I'm working on a project we have going on and the boys, being boys, are banished outside for a time due to their similarity to wild indians while Linley is asleep. So, all of a sudden both boys come marching in the house telling me I had to see something. Uh oh. I walk outside and there, on the roof of the garage, is Ethan's pillow pet "Wild Ears" on the roof. A pillow pet, outside, on the roof. I wouldn't have thought to put him there. Ethan's response: "Can you let me climb up there and get it?" Uh, no, but at least he asked.
An hour or so later we are inside. The boys are playing at the train table and I smell something. Linley is asleep so it can't be her dirty diaper. Next, who's to blame but Caleb.
Me: Caleb, did you poop?
Caleb: very quietly, Uh huh.
Me: You pooped AGAIN? Where?
Caleb: In the kitchen.
Me to myself: 1. Disgusting.
2. How much poop can 1 child have?
3. Disgusting.
4. I've got to clean that up. Or should he have to clean that up? No, I'm too much of a germ-a-phobe to have him clean it up.
5. I think I might cry.
Poop cleaned up, Praise the Lord Mammy has come over so I can go to a yard sale and meet John for a movie, where I don't have to clean up any one or anything's poop, or think about cats.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)