A few things I've learned for bathroom etiquette.
1. Never, I mean never, use anything that has not been in the towel closet. For instance, I caught Caleb in the bathroom, wiping, using MY towel that I hang up after a shower. Did I mention that I reuse my towels after a shower usually once? Yeah, that makes a nice thought. Wiping my face with my nice towel that Caleb used to wipe his rear. Yes, NEVER reuse a towel again.
2. Always check the lid. You may fall in, and if you may fall in, it probably has pee in it. Yes, screaming is usually involved.
3. If it is wet, even if it's in the sink, don't assume that it's from the water in the sink. Yesterday, Linley was so upset and would not stop crying. I took her to the bathroom, took care of morning business, went to wash my hands and my hairband was in it. I pick it up and hang it on a door knob when Linley all of a sudden quits crying and starts cracking up giggling.
I ask her what?
and she replies: "I pretended it was dirty. And washed it. In the TOILET." giggle giggle giggle.
Me: You washed it in the toilet?
Linley, giggling all the more now. "Yep." In her deep voice.
Me: So I guess you pulled it out with your hands huh?
Linley: Uh huh.
Yes, so this explains ALL of the water ON the toilet, ON the floor, and ON the sink. No use pretending that it's sink water. We all know what she did. But, I'm still not letting myself dwell on the fact that she washed my hairband in the toilet, which could possibly have had urine in it, and then put it in the sink, with water all over the entire bathroom. Just. Not. Going. There.
Lessons in bathroom etiquette at the Cole's: If you personally did not get it out of the linen closet, well, then, it's your own fault.
Sunday, May 24, 2015
Friday, May 22, 2015
Pride
Well, if you are reading this you probably have an issue with pride. I mean, fess up, we all have it. If you are a parent, I know you have it...otherwise God would not have given you children. I have determined that I must have had a heart issue of pride, or God would not have placed these bundles of joy with me and completely make me eat humble pie constantly. Privately, with the other children around, in front of my husband, and specifically this week in full view of everyone at the ballfields.
For instance:
1. Caleb is playing t-ball. Can I say one thing? Bless it. I mean really, t-ball. I remember Ethan playing t-ball and I was so stressed. Now here is Caleb, and well, I can't really be stressed. BECAUSE; Caleb playing hind-catcher the other night with you know, about 30 parents and various assorted children watching. When, the ENTIRE inning, he proceeds to dig in his buttcheecks. And let me tell you, this what not a discreet scratch, this was a searching for gold kind of scratch the FULL inning. And of course, grandparents are here watching, Ethan yells at him for support: Quit scratching your butt Caleb!. What can a parent do? I mean really? After telling him discreetly and giving him the "I'm going to kill you with my eyes" look which got a little giggle from him and a finger pointing at me, I make a bee-line to hubby in the dugout to PLEASE MOVE HIM TO OUTFIELD. He can't do that, he doesn't control the positions. Praise the Lord the game was over after that.
2. Ethan is playing machine-pitch baseball. He is going through some sort of thing where he has to know where we are at all times. Yes, I'm sorry son, I was like this as a child. So, the other night I was home with sick Abigail and John was at the fields. The game goes on for an extra-inning so John stands up just to stretch his legs. What do you think happens but the boy starts squalling like a baby. Literally, sobbing, on the field, surrounded by teammates and coaches. Poor Coach, he didn't know what was up and when Ethan saw John he calmed down. He just loves us, what can I say?
3. Tonight Caleb had a double header. Getting to the fields consisted of this: Abigail is ticked because she decided naps were not a necessity today at Mams and Pops' house, Linley is screaming because she didn't like the pants she was wearing, Caleb is being yelled at because he can't find his hat and for some reason his shoe is bothering him and he runs out of the house with a shoe in his hand. 3 out of 4. So we make it to the fields, game 1 is in the books with just a fussy Abigail. Then comes game 2. Oh game 2. Pride must have been an issue with game 1 (hey, he didn't dig his rear the whole time), so game 2 I must have needed humble pie. Enter Caleb practicing swinging to get up to bat, 5 feet in front of me, when you hear one of the loudest toots ever. He turns, giggles to the other teammate who DEFINITELY heard it, then he notices that a group of 3 teenage girls, a Mom, me and Granddad all heard it. The giggles get going by everyone in the stands. He turns around, looks at those teenage girls, and tells them to "Quit laughing." Which ends up making it worse so more laughing. Please, my head is in the sand now.
Linley is bored so she dumps the shoes. Then, it gets better. Linley decides she wants to play in a water hole. But wait, it hasn't rained in a couple days. So, she dumps her Sprite on the ground, and proceeds to jump in the Sprite barefooted right next to the dugout.
Resourceful.
Oh, it can't stop there.
Abigail is screaming so we are leaving. Then Linley decides that her pants are dirty. So, what does she do right beside her granddad? TAKE THEM OFF. Right there for all the world to see. Yes, she was wearing a dress so we could go with it, but getting them off, well, Pappy saw a full moon tonight and it was not the one rotating the Earth.
So, Pride, well there you have it. For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself. Galatians 6:3.
Oh yall, to give you a heads up, there was another incident that was so embarrassing that I will not write it on here. My kids will thank me later.
For instance:
1. Caleb is playing t-ball. Can I say one thing? Bless it. I mean really, t-ball. I remember Ethan playing t-ball and I was so stressed. Now here is Caleb, and well, I can't really be stressed. BECAUSE; Caleb playing hind-catcher the other night with you know, about 30 parents and various assorted children watching. When, the ENTIRE inning, he proceeds to dig in his buttcheecks. And let me tell you, this what not a discreet scratch, this was a searching for gold kind of scratch the FULL inning. And of course, grandparents are here watching, Ethan yells at him for support: Quit scratching your butt Caleb!. What can a parent do? I mean really? After telling him discreetly and giving him the "I'm going to kill you with my eyes" look which got a little giggle from him and a finger pointing at me, I make a bee-line to hubby in the dugout to PLEASE MOVE HIM TO OUTFIELD. He can't do that, he doesn't control the positions. Praise the Lord the game was over after that.
2. Ethan is playing machine-pitch baseball. He is going through some sort of thing where he has to know where we are at all times. Yes, I'm sorry son, I was like this as a child. So, the other night I was home with sick Abigail and John was at the fields. The game goes on for an extra-inning so John stands up just to stretch his legs. What do you think happens but the boy starts squalling like a baby. Literally, sobbing, on the field, surrounded by teammates and coaches. Poor Coach, he didn't know what was up and when Ethan saw John he calmed down. He just loves us, what can I say?
3. Tonight Caleb had a double header. Getting to the fields consisted of this: Abigail is ticked because she decided naps were not a necessity today at Mams and Pops' house, Linley is screaming because she didn't like the pants she was wearing, Caleb is being yelled at because he can't find his hat and for some reason his shoe is bothering him and he runs out of the house with a shoe in his hand. 3 out of 4. So we make it to the fields, game 1 is in the books with just a fussy Abigail. Then comes game 2. Oh game 2. Pride must have been an issue with game 1 (hey, he didn't dig his rear the whole time), so game 2 I must have needed humble pie. Enter Caleb practicing swinging to get up to bat, 5 feet in front of me, when you hear one of the loudest toots ever. He turns, giggles to the other teammate who DEFINITELY heard it, then he notices that a group of 3 teenage girls, a Mom, me and Granddad all heard it. The giggles get going by everyone in the stands. He turns around, looks at those teenage girls, and tells them to "Quit laughing." Which ends up making it worse so more laughing. Please, my head is in the sand now.
Linley is bored so she dumps the shoes. Then, it gets better. Linley decides she wants to play in a water hole. But wait, it hasn't rained in a couple days. So, she dumps her Sprite on the ground, and proceeds to jump in the Sprite barefooted right next to the dugout.
Resourceful.
Oh, it can't stop there.
Abigail is screaming so we are leaving. Then Linley decides that her pants are dirty. So, what does she do right beside her granddad? TAKE THEM OFF. Right there for all the world to see. Yes, she was wearing a dress so we could go with it, but getting them off, well, Pappy saw a full moon tonight and it was not the one rotating the Earth.
So, Pride, well there you have it. For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself. Galatians 6:3.
Oh yall, to give you a heads up, there was another incident that was so embarrassing that I will not write it on here. My kids will thank me later.
Friday, May 1, 2015
Ethan's 8
Ethan just turned 8 on April 1st. So, as usual, here is the top 8 things I love about you Ethan!
1. Your fun.
You make me laugh, and you are filled with joy. You dance around the house, make funny noises, and play jokes all the time. You are fun to be around!
2. Your faith and wisdom. Sometimes, it blows me away. In December I heard you stop and pray in the kitchen after breakfast. When I asked you what you were doing you told me, "Well, we're supposed to start our day talking to God." Yes, son. Amen. Your name means "wise" and that you are in so many ways.
3. Your perfectionism. Now this one does make it hard on mom and dad sometimes. But, God has made you detail oriented for a purpose and I appreciate it. God is going to use you to do mighty things with it.
4. Your empathy and compassion. Boy, you are one the most compassionate people I know. Truly. And you show it constantly (Though sometimes it is stretched thin with Caleb). You are constantly encouraging others, showing compassion for them, and are so understanding. God is going to use that to bring people to Him.
5. Your gentleness. You aren't very aggressive which can sometimes go against you in this world, but God has made you that way...and I appreciate it as well as others around you.
6. Your love your siblings and they love you. Linley Claire wants to play anything with you, and you will normally stop what you are doing to do it with her. She loves you.
7. You love. You love everyone. You especially Abigail, you can't handle it when she cries. You've even started going and getting her out of her crib when she starts crying and bring her to me. I really don't want to watch how you do that, but you do and she loves it. God is love. You are going to be an awesome Daddy and husband one day.
8. You are responsible. I trust you. I can depend on you. Yes, you are 8, but I trust you to make good judgement calls and good moral calls.
It's been some rough spots this year you getting closer to being in the tween stage. Some hard lessons are being learned especially about friends and fitting in. But here's what counts: God has made you,do your best and work for the Lord. Follow the straight and narrow despite the people around you and in the end, you will have for yourself treasure in Heaven. Being different is okay, it's actually pretty cool. Jesus was.
You make me laugh, and you are filled with joy. You dance around the house, make funny noises, and play jokes all the time. You are fun to be around!
2. Your faith and wisdom. Sometimes, it blows me away. In December I heard you stop and pray in the kitchen after breakfast. When I asked you what you were doing you told me, "Well, we're supposed to start our day talking to God." Yes, son. Amen. Your name means "wise" and that you are in so many ways.
3. Your perfectionism. Now this one does make it hard on mom and dad sometimes. But, God has made you detail oriented for a purpose and I appreciate it. God is going to use you to do mighty things with it.
4. Your empathy and compassion. Boy, you are one the most compassionate people I know. Truly. And you show it constantly (Though sometimes it is stretched thin with Caleb). You are constantly encouraging others, showing compassion for them, and are so understanding. God is going to use that to bring people to Him.
5. Your gentleness. You aren't very aggressive which can sometimes go against you in this world, but God has made you that way...and I appreciate it as well as others around you.
6. Your love your siblings and they love you. Linley Claire wants to play anything with you, and you will normally stop what you are doing to do it with her. She loves you.
7. You love. You love everyone. You especially Abigail, you can't handle it when she cries. You've even started going and getting her out of her crib when she starts crying and bring her to me. I really don't want to watch how you do that, but you do and she loves it. God is love. You are going to be an awesome Daddy and husband one day.
8. You are responsible. I trust you. I can depend on you. Yes, you are 8, but I trust you to make good judgement calls and good moral calls.
It's been some rough spots this year you getting closer to being in the tween stage. Some hard lessons are being learned especially about friends and fitting in. But here's what counts: God has made you,do your best and work for the Lord. Follow the straight and narrow despite the people around you and in the end, you will have for yourself treasure in Heaven. Being different is okay, it's actually pretty cool. Jesus was.
Friday, February 20, 2015
Linley is 3.
Yes. I am late on this. Over a month late. But hey. At least it's getting done.
This little girl is a super hero. She is not your run of the mill little girl. At least I don't think she is. She is dainty and she is a tomboy in one package. Literally. Her favorite things are playing superheroes with her brothers. As you can see.
She dances like no one is looking. Always remember this Linley Claire. Be exactly who God has created you to be. He is the only one the matters in the long run anyway.
Diva. Yes, I might classify you as a Diva. I mean, check out this pic. Hello? I do blame this on your brothers. They tend to dote on you.
Yes, you are a tomboy. You get that from me plus having two older brothers. Earlier this week,
you and I were playing Cinderella Barbie. I had the big one, and you had the smaller one. Yours was laying down. This is our discussion:
Me: Hello little Cinderella. What are you doing?
Linley: I'm dead.
Me: Little Cinderella you are dead?
Linley: Yes. I got shot in the belly.
Me: Oh no Little Cinderella. Can I help you?
Linley: No. I dead. I got shot in the belly.
Then you proceed to make her fall in the floor. Yes, you have big brothers too.
So, three things for your 3rd birthday to sum it up:
1. I love that you love Jesus. Everytime you go to sleep you have to name that Jesus loves everyone, including you, in our family. "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength."
2. I love that you are your own person. This is sometimes hard to deal with, especially on my end. You are loud, vocal, independent, and somewhat stubborn. *cough cough, no idea where that comes from. "I will praise You for I am fearfully and wonderfully made."
3. I love that you are so joyful. Girlfriend, you dance to just about anything and you got some moves. The other day you turned around to me, and said, "Mom, look, I SHAKE MY BOOTY!!" Merciful girl, you crack me up. "Be joyful in the Lord always!"
I love you Linley Claire! Happy 3rd birthday!
This little girl is a super hero. She is not your run of the mill little girl. At least I don't think she is. She is dainty and she is a tomboy in one package. Literally. Her favorite things are playing superheroes with her brothers. As you can see.
She dances like no one is looking. Always remember this Linley Claire. Be exactly who God has created you to be. He is the only one the matters in the long run anyway.
She is sweet. A lot of the time. Not 100%, but hey, pretty close.
Me: Hello little Cinderella. What are you doing?
Linley: I'm dead.
Me: Little Cinderella you are dead?
Linley: Yes. I got shot in the belly.
Me: Oh no Little Cinderella. Can I help you?
Linley: No. I dead. I got shot in the belly.
Then you proceed to make her fall in the floor. Yes, you have big brothers too.
So, three things for your 3rd birthday to sum it up:
1. I love that you love Jesus. Everytime you go to sleep you have to name that Jesus loves everyone, including you, in our family. "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength."
2. I love that you are your own person. This is sometimes hard to deal with, especially on my end. You are loud, vocal, independent, and somewhat stubborn. *cough cough, no idea where that comes from. "I will praise You for I am fearfully and wonderfully made."
3. I love that you are so joyful. Girlfriend, you dance to just about anything and you got some moves. The other day you turned around to me, and said, "Mom, look, I SHAKE MY BOOTY!!" Merciful girl, you crack me up. "Be joyful in the Lord always!"
I love you Linley Claire! Happy 3rd birthday!
Saturday, January 31, 2015
Car troubles
Today we had an adventure...in the van...that was NOT how we had planned...
As we are making our way to Mams and Pops' house tonight, we had to make a couple stops along the way. Wal-Mart (shocker), Tractor Supply (cows), and Lowe's (of course). Wal-Mart was the highlight since we spent Christmas money and the boys bought two new light-sabers that apparently have a light saber on EACH end, two for the price of two :P We then make it to TSC and I hear in the back, "When is Dad coming? Is it time to go eat at Mams and Pops yet?" "We're almost done and then we'll be at Mams and Pops'". At this point Abigail is starting to protest as well since she is ready for supper.
Next stop, Lowes. John goes in to my somewhat lecture: Go as fast as you can. Abigail is fussing and is ready to eat. (Of course she isn't as I'm pointing this out to John). John goes in and the complaining starts, "Mom, how long is Dad going to be in there? Is he coming? I've been praying to Jesus that he will come out but he STILL isn't coming. Are we going to live here?" My response: "He is coming, I told him to hurry because of Abigail. Sometimes it just takes a little while to get things." Ethan, "I don't think he heard you." Please note: John is finishing out our shower now so I will gladly wait at Lowe's while he buys supplies. Well, as gladly as you can with four kids in the car, two questioning, one screaming about the dvd of choice, and the baby crying for supper. I give Abigail her bottle, John comes out during this so I load up and sit (very uncomfortably) in between two captains chairs and start on the rest of our journey to Mams and Pops' house. Until, John turns the key in the ignition and the van will not start. And chaos sets in... Apparently, watching a dvd with two players, doors opening and closing, charging a cell-phone and/or a kindle-fire at one time will drain a battery. Just in case you didn't know.
After John and I exchange a few looks and what are we going to do now we reassure the kids (mainly Ethan) that we are not stuck here forever. John gets out and starts questioning people in the parking lot for jumper cables, which are ALWAYS in the other vehicle. Or, for the guy wearing nothing but Tennessee gear and John wearing nothing but UK gear (yes we were going to watch the game) he wasn't all about some neighborly help. As John runs into Lowe's to find either the battery charger or jumper cables this is the discussion in the van:
Ethan: Mom, what are we going to do?
Me: Wait on Dad, we will get it fixed.
Ethan: Mom, what are we going to do?
Ethan: What are we going to do Mom?
Ethan: Mom, what are we going to do?
Ethan: Mom, what are we going to do?
Ethan: Mom, what are we going to do?
Ethan: What are we going to do Mom?
Ethan: What are we going to do Mom?
Ethan: Mom, did you call Mams and Pops? Are they coming to get us?
Me: No, I text them. We will get someone here to jump us off.
I stopped counting that question after 6 times repeatedly. Then, the natives get restless and get out of their seats.
Caleb: OWWWWWW!!!! He just hit me!!!!!!
Ethan: Mom, are we going to live here?
Linley: I want out!!!!!!
Abigail: WAAAAA!!!
Ethan: Do you know how long people can live without food?
Me: 40 days.
Ethan: We are not Jesus. Only 1-2 days.
Me: apparently you didn't see Unbroken.
Caleb: We're all going to die. Mom, are we going to die?
Me: We're not going to die. It's the battery. Just wait on Dad.
Caleb: We're going to die and go to hell.
Ethan: We're not going to hell we're going to Heaven.
Me: What are we talking about?
Linley: I want out!!!!!
Abigail: WAAAA!!!!!
Caleb: OWWW! He just hit me!!!
Okay, so that new purchase from Wal-Mart is seriously fixing to be in the dumpster if they cannot figure out that a double light-saber does NOT need to be practiced in the van.
John comes back out of Lowe's with jumper cables and he flags down a good Samaritan worker coming in off their lunch break who brings his car over. During this time, I have tried to start this van at least one hundred times.
Ethan: Mom, this is the end. This is it for the Cole Family.
Me: Ethan, McDonalds is right behind us. We can walk there.
Ethan: Yeah, and we can drive to the hotel.
Me: Hellloooo, no van working.
Ethan: Oh yeah.
Caleb is now in the back singing to Abigail trying to get her to be quiet.
And then it happens.... it starts!!! Cheers erupt in the van!!
Ethan: YAAAYYYY!!! We're saved!!!! Can we go eat now? Have Mams and Pops eaten yet?
We finally make it to Mams and Pops' house, watch the game, watch Ethan and Caleb practice their Star Wars moves with their double light-sabers and hit themselves on the back of their head repeatedly (definitely going to have to be working on that hand-eye coordination thing with this toy), get through swimming in their pool (aka Mams' tub), and come back home.
Holy cow. What an interesting evening.
Friday, October 31, 2014
Uh oh, never a dull moment.
So, Linley Claire is going on 3. With Caleb, I have blogged and blogged about all of his antics. Let's just say Linley Claire, giving him a run for his money. This all happened just THIS week, so far we are only 5 days into this week.
Sunday: Linley is telling me she has pooped in her diaper. So, off we go, let's go clean up (yes, she is NOT potty trained, not for lack of trying on my part). I notice on her way down from the top bunkin the boys' room that there was a little on her leg, her diaper must have leaked. Then, I see her hands, specifically her fingers. Of course, I had to smell because you never know who has been sneaking chocolate around here. Rest assured, this is definitely NOT chocolate. Off to the bathroom to wash hands along with a lecture that we do not stick our hands in our diaper and touch poop. Then, to change the diaper I now see the front of her legs. There is smeared poop all up and down her right leg. Picture dried chocolate pudding here. Seriously? Why on God's green earth would you put poop on a leg? So now, as I'm changing the diaper I know that there has to be poop somewhere else.
Me: Linley, where is the rest of the poop?
Linley: In my diaper.
Me: Linley, where is the rest of the poop you pulled out of your diaper?
Linley: In Ethan's bed.
For the love, you have got to be kidding me. I call John, who doesn't even question when I say strip Ethan's bed, don't show it to me, just put it in the washer.
Tuesday: I'm teaching library at the new Christian school we have started at our church. Mrs. Jeanne, John's mom, is watching the girls. I'm into the lesson on fiction versus non-fiction when I hear our music minister say, Tori Cole? She's right there? So, who is that woman running frantically through the church looking for me? Oh, surely not MY MOTHER IN LAW WHO HAS BOTH GIRLS!!! After about a mini-heart attack I am told that Linley has stuffed a lego up her nose and she cannot get it out and she is here with both of them. Thankfully our music minister had the light app on his phone, and yes, far up in the left nostril is a lego, lodged in her nostril, behind the cartilage. I closed her right nostril and blew in her mouth. Nothing. Did it again, nothing. Did I mention that to do this to a two year old surrounded by adults is really not the easiest way to get a lego out. I finally get the dr on the phone, Russ is calling John who is teaching a college class at the moment, and I'm trying to convince Linley to blow her nose. Let's just say there is a reason God made her the child who can blow her nose the best. Out it shot onto the sanctuary floor during one good blow. Bless her. I really didn't know whether to laugh or cry considering our pastor walks out with the longest pair of tweezers I've ever seen in my life to help with the situation.
Wednesday: Abigail is sick with a cold and mad as a hornet. I take her to get the mail and walk back in, and I hear Linley. Crying. Seriously? I took a couple steps out of the house to get the mail and what has she done? Gotten in the jumparoo and gotten stuck. Picture this, her knees are touching the ground and her ankles are behind her back. And she is stuck. I mean, I'm pulling her and pulling her and canNOT get her out. I eventually turn the thing over sideways, move an ankle, and tug and out she pops. Now, she laughs hysterically at this: "I stuck in dere."
Thursday: I'm getting orders together for my business in the basement. She is down there with me doing her thing. She tells me now, "I stuck." She is literally 5 feet from me standing but she has walked around some boxes and the treadmill. "Are you stuck over there? Just walk back around the treadmill?" You know, she's two. Just walk around it. No no. She is STUCK. To the GLUE board that has some other insects stuck to it like a couple dead beets among other insects (this is our basement). So I go over and have to hold onto the glue board, she tugs her legs, and finally her foot comes off the glue board. And the dead insects stay on. Lecture again: we do not put our feet on glue boards with insects stuck to them.
This girl, oh this girl. She cracks me up constantly and truly is a blessing. This afternoon I told her, in the car, to just take a nap for a minute. And I turn back around, next thing I know, I hear snoring. Love her.
Sunday: Linley is telling me she has pooped in her diaper. So, off we go, let's go clean up (yes, she is NOT potty trained, not for lack of trying on my part). I notice on her way down from the top bunkin the boys' room that there was a little on her leg, her diaper must have leaked. Then, I see her hands, specifically her fingers. Of course, I had to smell because you never know who has been sneaking chocolate around here. Rest assured, this is definitely NOT chocolate. Off to the bathroom to wash hands along with a lecture that we do not stick our hands in our diaper and touch poop. Then, to change the diaper I now see the front of her legs. There is smeared poop all up and down her right leg. Picture dried chocolate pudding here. Seriously? Why on God's green earth would you put poop on a leg? So now, as I'm changing the diaper I know that there has to be poop somewhere else.
Me: Linley, where is the rest of the poop?
Linley: In my diaper.
Me: Linley, where is the rest of the poop you pulled out of your diaper?
Linley: In Ethan's bed.
For the love, you have got to be kidding me. I call John, who doesn't even question when I say strip Ethan's bed, don't show it to me, just put it in the washer.
Tuesday: I'm teaching library at the new Christian school we have started at our church. Mrs. Jeanne, John's mom, is watching the girls. I'm into the lesson on fiction versus non-fiction when I hear our music minister say, Tori Cole? She's right there? So, who is that woman running frantically through the church looking for me? Oh, surely not MY MOTHER IN LAW WHO HAS BOTH GIRLS!!! After about a mini-heart attack I am told that Linley has stuffed a lego up her nose and she cannot get it out and she is here with both of them. Thankfully our music minister had the light app on his phone, and yes, far up in the left nostril is a lego, lodged in her nostril, behind the cartilage. I closed her right nostril and blew in her mouth. Nothing. Did it again, nothing. Did I mention that to do this to a two year old surrounded by adults is really not the easiest way to get a lego out. I finally get the dr on the phone, Russ is calling John who is teaching a college class at the moment, and I'm trying to convince Linley to blow her nose. Let's just say there is a reason God made her the child who can blow her nose the best. Out it shot onto the sanctuary floor during one good blow. Bless her. I really didn't know whether to laugh or cry considering our pastor walks out with the longest pair of tweezers I've ever seen in my life to help with the situation.
Wednesday: Abigail is sick with a cold and mad as a hornet. I take her to get the mail and walk back in, and I hear Linley. Crying. Seriously? I took a couple steps out of the house to get the mail and what has she done? Gotten in the jumparoo and gotten stuck. Picture this, her knees are touching the ground and her ankles are behind her back. And she is stuck. I mean, I'm pulling her and pulling her and canNOT get her out. I eventually turn the thing over sideways, move an ankle, and tug and out she pops. Now, she laughs hysterically at this: "I stuck in dere."
Thursday: I'm getting orders together for my business in the basement. She is down there with me doing her thing. She tells me now, "I stuck." She is literally 5 feet from me standing but she has walked around some boxes and the treadmill. "Are you stuck over there? Just walk back around the treadmill?" You know, she's two. Just walk around it. No no. She is STUCK. To the GLUE board that has some other insects stuck to it like a couple dead beets among other insects (this is our basement). So I go over and have to hold onto the glue board, she tugs her legs, and finally her foot comes off the glue board. And the dead insects stay on. Lecture again: we do not put our feet on glue boards with insects stuck to them.
This girl, oh this girl. She cracks me up constantly and truly is a blessing. This afternoon I told her, in the car, to just take a nap for a minute. And I turn back around, next thing I know, I hear snoring. Love her.
Wednesday, October 1, 2014
Turkey Break
Lots of things going on around here as usual. If I had time to write weekly I would, but I don't. So here is everything all at once.
I want to be like my kids when I grow up.
We've been talking about ISIS lately and what is happening to Christians in other countries. Specifically, children who love Jesus enough to die for Him. The boys were discussing this right before prayer time the other night.
Caleb: Yes!!!!! I want to die!!! I GET TO SEE JESUS!!!!!!
Ethan: No. We can't die yet. We need to tell others about Jesus.
Yeah, so I just sat there in silence. My kids, no worries, no what would happen to me? Just complete elation to see Jesus and the other the job that needs to be done. Man. I want to be like them when I grow up.
The Ten Commandments
Last week we went to the park while Ethan played soccer. Caleb hit a little girl. I didn't see it, but I knew it was him because he WILLINGLY went and apologized to her when I told him to. (Please understand, Caleb does not WILLINGLY apologize to anyone.) So even though I asked him if he hit her and he said, "No I didn't do it," and "She hit me in the back" I knew that the truth was not being told. I let that one slide about lying. For one, I was at the park surrounded by people, 2, monumental step forward for him not throwing a fit to say sorry to a complete stranger, and 3, I had a baby strapped to my chest and a two year old running around my feet.
The next night all 3 are in the tub. We have the color tablets and I have a rule that only one or two get to go in the tub a night. We don't need brown water, it's dirty enough. So, when I spilled them and turn around to start picking them up Caleb jumps out of the tub and grabs another and quickly throws it in the tub. Then, he tells on himself (guilty conscience).
Caleb: I put another one in. (Now quickly) One of those fell in the tub.
Me: Caleb, you are lying. That is not the truth. That does not make God happy, that is breaking one of the ten commandments...we have our talk. Caleb, that is two times that I have caught you lying. More discipline talk.
Caleb: tantrum in tub
Ethan: Mom, you need to show grace to Caleb. Remember, Jesus shows us grace and you should show him some grace.
Me: Ethan, Caleb is lying. I love him too much the let him sin. He has to learn that he can't lie.
Caleb: continue fit
Ethan to Caleb: Ethan gives him a big lesson on discipline and ends with this: "You won't want to sin anymore and Mom loves you and wants to teach you not to sin."
At this point I think Ethan should be the parent.
Linley Claire has dropped taking her paci. She just forgot about it one night and I never mentioned it because I knew it was somewhere OUTSIDE and there was no way I was going to look around outside at 9 at night for a paci. I mean, I did that last week, I'm not going to do it again this week. So, she's only asked for it a few times. I mean, wow. God blessed me with this answer to prayer. Now I'm moving on to potty training. Here's to hoping she does it by herself...there is always a chance right?
Turkey break
Our steer decided to wreak havoc on the turkey pen. So they are out now. I'm not a big fan of the turkeys, let's leave it at that. Last night I was taking Caleb to soccer practice and I drive by our neighbors house and out of the corner of my eye I see some huge birds on top of their car. Is it a crane? Hmm, that's weird. Then, I turn and I see it:
Those are our turkeys on top of their car. Holy cow. So naturally I call John. He is dealing with Abigail so I turn around and go back and deal with them. I start hysterically waving my arms and they just stare at me. I grab a stick and try to shew them and they turn their backs to me, I throw the stick and it sticks in the feathers. For crying out loud, help a girl out here. I grab a long stick and am running around the car poking them trying to get them off. As I am doing this, they are pooping quarter cups fulls of poop all over the top of their car. Are you kidding me? I finally get the female off and then I start poking at Tom. Tom, the one with the black beard and on the hood, is kind of arrogant and likes to strut his stuff. I have to say I was running on the other side of the car to get back to the van making sure he wasn't chasing me.
I get back in the van, Caleb is in the middle next to Linley watching all of this go down. I wonder what he thinks in his head about me? We start heading to soccer practice. I call John. He asks me if I tried to get them to head back to our house. And that's a negative. Last time I saw them they were headed to the big road, and honestly, I wasn't about to stop them. We make it to soccer after all of this and low and behold, soccer is CANCELLED. Now Linley Claire is throwing a fit because she wants to go to soccer practice. Bless her. She's two. Soccer is for Caleb. We get home after this thirty minute rendezvous and John has the turkeys back in the pen and Abigail asleep. At least that's accomplished. I talked to our neighbors this morning and apologized and offered the boys' services of cleaning the car but they had already done it (it's 10 in the morning!! holy cow!!) and she was wondering what it was on there. Squirrel, cat? I don't know why she wouldn't right off the bat think of turkeys. I mean, that's only natural.
*If you want two midget white turkeys, John has them listed on craigslist. I'm sure we will give you a good deal for them!*
*If you want two midget white turkeys, John has them listed on craigslist. I'm sure we will give you a good deal for them!*
Just a few of the blessings going on around here and I wouldn't change a thing, Well, except for the pooping turkeys, but what would one of my blogs be without a little bit of poop?
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